Ever had those moments when someone mocked you about how you were sperging and you didn’t have a clever comeback? Or perhaps you wanted to simply talk badly about someone you despise, but couldn’t think of what to write? Well, Dorlene B Lindzznth, a “professional insultress”, might be someone you’d like to hire.
Ghostwriter Lindzznth’s Kickstarer project, Proffessional Insultress For Hire, is more of a commission than it is an actual project. There are only three options you can choose to buy, ranging from $3-10, which range from venting, personalized insults and even “other creative, customized writing.”
If you’re looking for someone to put icing on your burn by trying to make someone else’s life into shit with verbal abuse, you might have to look elsewhere. What Lindzznth is offering is not meant to be used for online bullying or hate speech, as she states, “My insults are clever, and always seem to bring a smile – even to the targeted insulted one(s).”
Further expanding on what Lindzznth’s service is providing, she “offer[s] a service that will provide a clever means of venting that particular thought toward someone or something that the client believes needs to be ‘insulted’, or simply told off. The insult does not need to be sent, nor delivered to be a success. It’s into the vent-sharing that this service provides.”
At the moment, the Kickstarter project is still new and young and has yet to have gotten any funding. Those who do invest in the service should, according the project page, expect their paid insult to be delivered by April 2013.